Losing Control
by syrupjunkie
Summary: When the rhythm courses through you like a wave, when your heart speeds up like there’s no tomorrow, when you lose all control, when you feel that everything thing inside you wants to be set free, then that is the time when it is dangerous to speak.


Author's Note:  This idea has floated around in my mind for some time.  I used chan and kun just because it reminded me more of the CCS series.  This is not your average dance fic though, no streamers, no school, no prom-like stuff.  Still has mush though, why wouldn't there be?  Just not mapley syrup sap.  I can't describe it much more than that, but have you ever been to a rave?  Where something takes control and you don't want to fight it?  Well this is it.  I'm glad I did this, school's too hectic and I can't seem to get my other story's chapters up on schedule.  Oh well, read and review please.

Japanese vocab:           Kongbanwa (may not be spelled right) – good evening

                                    Honto - really 

                                    Kawaii- cute

                                    Gomen- sorry

Disclaimer:  *holds up picture of CLAMP* *Holds up picture of me*  Nope, don't own CCS.

Losing Control 

"Ahem."  He waited uneasily.

Tomoyo opened an eye spotting Syaoran in her peripheral; she held her index finger in the air warding him off before she finished her task.  After an eternity standing bathed in the dimness, she pulled away from a disappointed Eriol.  "Oh, Li-kun, I'm glad you made it."

"Though you could've chosen a better time to appear."  Eriol Hiragizawa seemed a bit put off, Tomoyo no longer in his clutch, her lips no long pressed against hers.

"Whatever.  Who else are we waiting for?"

Tomoyo quirked an eyebrow, "You mean besides Sakura-chan?"  She continued with a smirk adorning her lips as she noted his flushed appearance.  "Just Yamakazi-kun and Chiharu-chan."  

"I do believe there they come."  Eriol gestured towards two approaching figure, one smiling dumbly, the other barely containing her fury.  "Konbangwa, Yamakazi-kun, Mihara-san."

The addressed girl lost the anger in her eyes as she approached the group.  "Konbangwa, Hiragizawa-kun.  Gomen for being late; _someone_ decided to stop and tell lies to all the strangers we passed."  She squeezed her boyfriend's arm tighter eliciting a yelp of pain from him.

His goofy smile remained plastered, defending himself.  "Well, that last story was true; there are really large squids in the sea."

"Yes, I know, but did you have to tell people you would have you good luck if you shook one of its tentacles?  Just stop telling lies; it's bad enough I have to deal with it in private, but in public?"  She waved her clench fist dangerously.  "Learn to control yourself or else!"

Takashi gulped slightly cowering from the threat hanging before him.  "Why don't we go in?"

Tomoyo laughed, her usual 'ohohohoho' "We're waiting for Sakura-chan; I hope she didn't get lost.  But knowing her, she's probably late."

"That sounds about right."  Eriol smiled enigmatically.  "Why don't we head in, Tomoyo dear; there's much to do inside."

She caught his innuendo with an amused smile.  "Oh, I would love to, but you know what they say.  Business before pleasure."

"Oh, and what business would that be?"  Eriol seemed genuinely confused, a rarity as it was.

Tomoyo looked down the street seeing the running figure approaching.  Her eyes burst into stars, her hands itching for her camera.  "Why to capture Sakura-chan in my outfit."

Syaoran, Takashi and Chiharu sweatdropped, looking at Sakura rushing towards them.  Eriol merely looked at Tomoyo indulgently, a whimsical grin on his face.  "Konbangwa, Sakura-chan!"

Sakura looked up finding all the others already gathered.  "Konbanwa, Eriol-kun.  Gomen; I had a hard time finding this place.  I must have went into at least three dead ends."

Chiharu looked over Sakura, a question forming in her mouth.  "Tomoyo-chan, Sakura-chan's outfit is a coat?"  Sakura blushed lightly, wrapping her long coat tighter around her.  "How are you supposed to dance wearing that?"

Tomoyo frowned slightly, her wondrous creation hidden.  "Sakura-chan, don't tell me you're not going to let everyone see how 'kawaii' you are."

"T-Tomoyo-chan, I promised I'd wear your outfit, but I didn't think it would be so…open."

"Nonesense, Sakura-chan; there's no need for embarrassment.  You certainly have the figure to wear something so 'open' as you call it, ne, Li-kun?"

Syaoran, caught off guard by Eriol's question, barely stuttered out a "U-un."

Sakura blushed faintly, her head bent down low, but still with a death grip on her coat.  Tomoyo's mind was working furiously.  'If flattery doesn't work, then I'll just have to try guilt.'  "Sakura-chan, I understand if you don't want to show everyone."  She sniffled at a dramatic pause.  "I mean it's probably really ugly considering I was tired staying up late to sew it.  I should just be grateful that you wore my hideous creations for so long without a complaint."  Tomoyo threw herself into Eriol's chest, hiding her smirk in his shirt, her sobbing coming loudly.  'One, two, three…'

Sakura felt horrible, her mind yelling at itself at hurting Tomoyo's feelings.  She pulled Tomoyo into a hug, releasing the folds of her coat.  "I'm so sorry, Tomoyo-chan.  I didn't mean to hurt your feelings; nothing you make me is ugly.  In fact, this outfit is very beautiful.  I…I will show everyone your wonderful design."

"Honto?"  Tomoyo sniffled lightly feeling the bulge of her camcorder in her purse.

"Of course; this means a lot to you."  Tomoyo pulled away standing by Eriol, her face pulled into a smile.  She barely made out a whispered 'well done' from her boyfriend.  Her smile grew larger; she took out her camera, focusing on the uneasy teenager before her.

Sakura slowly pulled her arms from her sleeves, the coat dropping inch by inch, bare skin exposed to the cold.  The rest of her cloak fell downward, as well as her eyes, but she heard the gasps.

Everyone inhaled sharply at the sight of Sakura.  Even Takashi opened his eyes, nearly bulging from their sockets.  It wasn't that her outfit was extremely complicated or magnificent.  In fact, it was only a light pink t-shirt, a short dull yellow skirt, and plastic looking boots.  It was just that she was much more…exposed…than they'd ever seen her.  The shirt hugged her tightly her shoulders bare but for thin straps, her arms uncovered, half her back for all to see the front dipped barely preserving modesty.  Her flat stomach showed between the shirt and skirt which in itself went mid thigh.  Tomoyo broke the silence with a 'Kawaii!'

Chiharu recovered next.  "Wow Sakura-chan, Eriol-kun was right.  You _do_ have the figure to pull it off."  The rest of the group nodded appreciatively, except Syaoran whose jaw remained lodged open, his face a nuclear red.  He barely steadied himself, the blood rushing so fast.

"Arigatou, Chiharu-chan."  Sakura looked nervously up to find the gazes of her friends, as well as many spectators standing off to the side.  "Why don't we go in, it's sort of cold here."

"Hai!" every agreed, except a stunned Syaoran who nodded dumbly, barely able to coordinate his feet to move towards the door.

____________________________________________ 

The music was assaulting, a techno mix hanging frantically in the air, on people's lips, racing through their bodies.  The scene was bedlam, people scattered everywhere, lost in the trance, eyes holding unadulterated bliss, voices screaming into the sequenced chaos.

"Sakura-chan, why don't you go dance with Li-kun?"  Tomoyo posed the question lightly with a serious undercurrent that did not escape her two friends. She had all but made Takashi and Chiharu leave five minutes earlier.  Eriol merely looked at her inquisitively as Sakura and Syaoran stood up ready to venture out into the ocean of dancing people.  "Finally, some alone time with you."

Eriol grinned fiercely, his mouth already dangerously close to hers.  "I can make it so that we could be even more alone."  Tomoyo merely shifted her weight to lean more against him.

"I would accept, but knowing you, I'd have a hard time maintaining my decency."  Her own mischievous smile surfaced as a new though struck her.  "But even here, we can have a little…fun."  She leaned upward, both lost in the depths of each other's presence.

______________________________________

Yamakazi and Chiharu returned from the bar, only to be greeted by the scene of Eriol and Tomoyo amidst and tangle of arms, lips and bodies.  Suffice to say, they walked on, heading to someplace quieter.   

They found themselves in a pseudo-lounge, a separate room filled with people reclining on sofas, sipping drinks, taking a rest from dancing.  Orange paper lanterns were dangling from the ceiling, red shaded lamps sat on table casting a scarlet radiance about the room.  Several people passed by, amazed at the sight.  "I wonder why they chose paper lanterns?" one girl asked.

Chiharu felt Takashi's body tremble slightly, his willpower basically eroded down to nothing.  She sighed as she heard the first few sounds from his mouth.  "Because paper lanterns were traditionally used in dances, but because the people who held them would be swaying, the candles would burn the paper.  So they hang them from ceilings now."  He held up his right index finger as further proof.  "These are orange because it is tradition to have orange at dances on Friday nights."

The girl's group had stopped when they heard Yamakazi's voice.  "Honto?"  The girl was confused, knowing something didn't add up in his explanation.  Some of her other friends were nodding dumbly, trying to process the new information, while a few others looks disbelievingly at him.

Chiharu could hold it in no longer; her opened palm went flat against the back of her boyfriend's head.  "Come on, let's go!"  She dragged him off by his ear to an isolated corner, humiliated beyond belief.  She threw themselves onto an empty couch, her face irritated.  "What am I going to do with you?"

Yamakazi smiled ignorantly.  "What do you mean?"

She sighed heavily.  "I don't know why I put up with this."

His smile became even sillier, broad and lopsided.  "Because you love me?"

"I know, just my luck, ne?"  She suddenly jumped him, both laying on their backs.  The groups scattered in the lounge looked at the two who were laughing and kissing.  They just shook their heads thinking 'how weird is that couple?' and went back their own conversations.

______________________________________

"Syaoran-kun, are you sure?"  Sakura paused hesitantly on the edge of the dance floor.

"Hai.  You go dance; I think I'll wait here."  He couldn't very well tell her that he'd probably die if he was dancing and feeling her skin rub up against him every other second.

"Fine."  Sakura sighed exasperatedly.  "Demo…I'm going to get you to dance tonight.  That's a promise."  She stepped gingerly onto the dance floor.  Soon she was taken over by the music blaring overhead.

The dance floor was packed, a heaving mass of underdressed flesh and swirling glow sticks.  The repeated intervals of flashing from the strobe light bathed the whole scene in broken illumination.  Bass shook through the floor, the walls and ceilings pulsating as if they were alive.  Each flash brought sharp contrast on skin before disappearing into the melodic darkness once again.  Syaoran stood at the edge of the crowd, watching Sakura dance, her arms and body free from the constraints of conscious control. Every time the light flashed, she was paused, her outline clear and ethereal, her skin glowing an unnatural white, her eyes a supernatural piercing green, glowing with life itself in the brief illumination.  She danced on, unaware of the perfect photographs her body made every second as the bulb came to life and then died away, repeated over and over, her arms at different positions, her body frozen in the quick light; the preservation of innocence.

As the music died down a little, her figure straightened, her glowing skin approaching Syaoran.  He was sweating, the feel of a dark red on his face; she had no idea how hard it was to watch her coming.  She stopped at the edge of the dance floor, her only movement was to lift her left arm, her hand beckoning him to come to her.  He found himself next to her in an instant, his feet having done all the thinking.  As the music intensified again, he felt her body start to move, her arms brushing against him every other second.  He felt his control sloughing off, as his body seemed to move in rhythm to hers synchronously.

_______________________________________

The throbbing became even more irregular, the music pushing against their eardrums, their brains succumbing to the mixed emotions swirling within.   Hands, arms, bodies moved without control, something hypnotic taking over.  Two pairs of eyes, ocher and jade, focused on each other as the lights flashed on and off, the music dictating their every move.  Beyond consciousness, their bodies gave in to what had been denied so long:  each other.  Fingers found each other as their hands grasped, the pleasant shock of skin pressed against flesh.  Fitful music swelled, blanketing the already thick atmosphere with its spellbinding enchantment.  The two heads met automatically, each knowing instinctively what part to play.  Hunger awakened, denied emotions arched from their bodies each other.  Sakura's hands jerked free of Syaoran's as the music pushed her, her body still swaying, her fingers tangling into his hair.  Syaoran's free hand found the uncovered sweat slicked skin of her back, ecstasy flowing from her skin into his fingertips.  Faces met in the lightning-like darkness, mouths impatiently moving frantically to satiate their desires.  As they pulled apart, breathing ragged, eyes holding little or no recognition. Lips met lips again without doubt, without hesitation, hands moving, a tempting pressure on each other.  The waves were unstoppable, a pulsating force from the depths of each other's souls yearning to be unrestrained.

All the feelings imprisoned found cracks in his consciousness, as the music's rhythm bore more deeply into his mind.  His body had already found its relief, pressed up against Sakura, his lips registering the smooth skin of her neck.  His mind subsided, all rational thought slipping through the gaps of his self-control.  He brought his mouth close to her ear, the words spilling from their long confinement.  "I love you." 

Sakura paused rigid in her movements, looking up at Syaoran as a new surge of newcomers flooded into the room, jostling and pushing.  Syaoran felt his grip on her loosen as he was distanced by the streaming of a crowd.  Her slender figure was lost in a sea of new faces, her soft voice floating barely above the music. "Syaoran?"

_____________________________

Sakura stood uncertainly in the midst of strangers; Syaoran had just admitted he loved her, but where was he?  She pressed her way through the crowd until finding herself standing before her table, Eriol and Tomoyo still engrossed in each other.  She wiped the sweat from her brow as she waited patiently, albeit uncomfortably waiting for the couple's breath to run out.  Tomoyo broke the kiss tilting her head questioningly at Sakura.  "What's wrong?"

Eriol almost scowled, annoyance playing on his face at being interrupted twice in one night.  He teased, "First it was your boyfriend, and now you.  Doshtano?"

Sakura pinked slightly; Eriol didn't know how close he came to the truth.  She didn't know where to begin, but she felt that the key was finding Syaoran.  "Have you seen Syaoran-kun?"  She nodded in a disappointment as the couple shook their heads.

"Gomen nasai, Sakura-chan; I've been…preoccupied this evening."  Tomoyo smiled knowingly turning back to her boyfriend.

Eriol returned her look with an exaggerated attempt at a seductive smirk.  "Hai, Sakura-chan; if you'd kindly go search for Li-kun, I have unfinished business at attend to."  He sipped his drink as his arm wound its way around Tomoyo's waist.

Tomoyo laughed appreciatively moving her hands to his neck.  "I'm sure you'll find Li-kun, Sakura-chan."

"U-un.  I'll be going then."  Sakura backed away leaving her two friends to their activities, not without turning red at the thought that it could be she and Syaoran like that soon.  But that all depended on finding him, and weaving her way through the crowds, that seemed like a slim possibility.

She kept running, the strobe light lighting her path for a second before plunging her into a darkness, like a cavern broken by the deafening music; her feet seemed to fall into rhythm with the overhead throbbing, her footfalls the beats, choreographed.  She finally found herself cornered at a locked door, forced to return the way she came, but being detained by some men, her arm grabbed.

"Matte.  Where you going, beautiful?"  The man with the grip on her arm slurred; the perfume of alcohol lacing his breath.

Sakura inhaled in agitation; it was like this at school, walking down the street, and now at a rave.  "Onegai; I have somewhere to be."  She wrenched her arm out of his grasp and she put a foot forward to move.  His friends blocked her path again, her irritation building.

"Not even enough time for a dance?"

"No.  I must really be going."  She found her wrist again in his clutches; she smirked in disbelief.  'I'm going to actually have to kick his ass.'  In a blur, her move hidden in the split second darkness of the strobe light, the man found himself laying on the floor, Sakura's foot hovering over his chest.  "Like I said, I'm busy."  The other two men let her pass; she paused long enough to hear an appreciative 'damn' from on of the men.  She would have to thank Syaoran for teaching her that move later, that is if she could just find him.  Again she plunged into the madness, blindly searching for her needle in a haystack.

_______________________________

Syaoran stood in the lounge escaping the grasp of some women following him, especially one that reminded him distinctly of Meiling.  He heaved a sigh in relief when he couldn't spot them near him.  Sakura had to be around here somewhere; maybe he could find Daidouji and Hiragizawa or Mihara and Yamakazi.  As if responding to his thoughts, he heard the distinct shout of Chiharu.  It echoed from a darkened corner of the lounge, maroon light silhouetting the group's outlines.  

"Lies!"  The shout became louder as Syaoran approached, the figures taking on crisper lines and more details.  He joined a small group of people to look at the scene:  Chiharu had her hands wrapped around Takashi's neck, shaking him violently.  "Lies!  All I asked for was a night without your stories!"

Yamakazi was laughing as she screamed.  "But I only lie to the ones I love, and since I lie to you the most, I must love you the most."

Chiharu almost face-faulted at his nonsensical logic.  She let him go dropping him to the ground; she groaned falling into the couch.  "I give up!" She rubbed her temples, feeling the headache building.

Takashi sat up undaunted, a mysterious gleam in his eyes.  "You know what they say about how to cure a headache?"

Chiharu was afraid to ask.  "What?"  

Suddenly she found her pulled to the ground with Yamakazi placing his mouth firmly over hers.   "This."  

Chiharu shook her head, a smile on her face.  "Well…my headache is gone, so I guess I'll have to trust you this time."  Again, lips met, broken by the uncontrollable laughter of both.

The small audience looked on in incredulity.  Whispers of 'they're so weird' and 'I don't get it, one minute she's about to rip his head off, the next they're like this' were heard.

Syaoran watched, rolling his eyes, the sight all too familiar.  He went scarlet recalling that he and Sakura were doing the same thing Chiharu and Takashi were only moments before.  He stood before the two as the crowd dispersed.  Chiharu spotted him first sitting up and dusting herself off; Yamakazi groaned slightly as she pressed her weight onto his stomach.

"Could you get off me Chiharu?"

"I don't think so; consider this your punishment for lying."  She remained sitting on Yamakazi addressing Syaoran, "Li-kun, is something wrong?"

Syaoran stood a little confused at the scene before him, but continued nonetheless. "Ano…have you seen Sakura around?"

"Iie.  She hasn't been here."  Yamakazi pushed Chiharu off his stomach, she propped up against the seat of the sofa.  She giggled promptly ignoring Syaoran's presence.  He merely left the scene shaking his head as the words 'you know about…' caught his ear.

__________________________________

Sakura sighed as she reached the lounge, the last corner of the building she hadn't searched; something told her this was where her destiny lay, the place where her life became something worthwhile.  Amidst the maroon glow, she proved herself right; Syaoran was leaving from the opposite end of the room.  She chased after him.  "Syaoran!"

Syaoran heard someone calling him from somewhere behind him, his name floating through the air on a light voice.  "Sakura?"  He turned and ran closer to the voice, pushing his way through crowds and couples each step closer quickening his heart; his life laid out before him.  He paused before he reached her, afraid of her reaction.  She stopped too, a few feet away.  No words were exchanged for quite a while.  "Sak…"  

Sakura answered him the only way she could, something with her passion, yearned for by every fibre of her being.  Mouth met mouth, something fiery exploding between the two, tongues exploring the intricacies of each other, fingers entangled in hair, lungs burning.  Pulling away, he had his answer, the future shining with an intensity that it was blinding.

The music started again, visceral and unrestrained, the familiar rhythm pulsating through the building like a heartbeat, awakening the senses:  passion, anger, joy and most importantly love.

~Owari~

_________________________________

Author's Note:  Well that's it, didn't suck too bad, did it?  Tell me what you thought.


End file.
